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The repetition issue in defining bullying behaviour

In Australia and in many other parts of the world a key part of the definition of bullying behaviour is that the behaviour is repeated. This creates the weird situation where it might be okay to use a behaviour once, but if you use it again it then becomes buying behaviour and is then unacceptable. Surely for justice is to be served, we would not want that behaviour to occur at all. Read More...

Five more mistakes to avoid when dealing with behaviours

Here are some more tips on what to avoid when dealing with inappropriate behaviour.

1. Avoid creating the situation into a win/lose proposition. You can use consequences but make sure you are not going to gain something out of it. 'If you do not get this done I will give some of my work to do' is not a good way to provide consequences. You appear like you are abusing your authority and this can create resentment. Read More...

Flirting verse sexual harassment

What is the difference between flirting and sexual harassment? It is important to know because our sexuality is a core part of our personal identity. Bullying behaviour can include sexually based content and overtones. This creates an overlap between sexual harassment, sexual discrimination and bullying behaviour. Bullying behaviour users will sometimes argue that no harm was intended and they where just joking. When it involves being sexist or sexually based content they might argue they where just flirting. So here is the difference. Read More...

Fun and jokes verses bullying behaviour

One of the most used excuses for explaining or justifying bullying behaviour is that it was just some harmless fun. "It was just a joke" or "we were all just having a bit of fun". So where is the line? How can you tell when behaviour crosses over and becomes bullying behaviour. This is difficult question to answer but here is some tips. Read More...

How to promote decency in any organisation

It takes more than good intentions to have a pleasant and successful workplace, school or organisation. You need the right structures, policies and procedures to help people get things done and ensure everyone is treated with respect. However you also need to be able to deal with issues effectively. Below is some ways in which you can promote a healthy organisation and minimise some of the risk factors.
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Don't allow the festive season spirit to undo all your good work

With the festive season now in full swing it can be easy to overlook behaviours that we would not have accept a few weeks ago. For some reason we can think that because it is the season of goodwill its fine to ignore inappropriate behaviours so as not to upset others. Unfortunately that can just set a bad example. Read More...

Avoiding the 7 traps of not recognising bullying behaviour

My previous post discusses 7 reasons why we fail to recognise some behaviours as bullying behaviours. So below is some things that we can do about to avoid these traps. Read More...

7 Traps in failing to recognise bullying behaviour

One of the tricky parts of recognising if a behaviour is bullying behaviour is that we all have different views and perceptions. This can lead to one person thinking the behaviour is okay while another to see it as inappropriate. Mishna (2012) outlines 7 factors effecting our perceptions on bullying behaviour which are summarised below. Read More...

Responding to talking things up

When young people get to gather they love to talk. But if it is "deviant talk" then this can be a problem when it is not held in check. Talking up inappropriate behaviour which is then received positively by peers, can encourage the group to act out those behaviours. Read More...

Don't tolerate zero tolerance

As a policy for how we deal with inappropriate behaviour, zero tolerance wants us to believe that if we clamp down hard enough this fixes the problem. Any problem. But behaviour is a complex area and simplistic solutions do not address this complexity and lead to other issues. Read More...

6 reasons to avoid using punishment

It is tempting to think that using punishment will solve a behaviour problem. These behaviours need to be change but most do not need a heavy handed approach. There are some people that think using punishment is the way to go, including using physical punishment. The problem with this is: Read More...

Beware of blaming either nature or nurture.

The age old debate continues about the influences of nature verse nurture and how this impacts on behaviour. It is easier to focus on one or the other but the reality is more complex. We can tend to blame one or the other just to suit the situation we face. Both play a part and we need to beware of putting too much blame on either of nature and nurture. The reasons for this is it can limit our view on the solutions. Read More...

Two ways anger helps you

Anger is an emotion that people most often think of as being negative, destructive and something to be avoid at all costs. But anger can help you. First of all it lets you know that something is wrong.
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It is the behaviour, not the person!

It can be tempting to let fly when someone does the wrong thing. But using a label like “your bad”, calling people names or using putdowns does not help the situation. There is a range of reasons why. Read More...
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